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Saturday, February 9, 2013

Motivational Thinking

            As y'all know:

       My proposed deadline is next fall/winter to be done editing and starting to take this documentary to some festivals (or at least submitting to some). Well that has always been an "if it gets done by then it gets done by then" deadline. I got some news last night that's changing my plans to really needing to get done by next fall (2013).

The Twist:

               I got a tentative offer late last night to be a PA for an indie film. It's supposed to begin production next fall (hopefully it'll at east get pushed back to next winter). While I'm really excited about this offer, and knowing the world after this doc to not be a complete void of self-employment, I'm a little nervous about agreeing to stray from my projected career path so early. Hopefully [if I take this job] my career won't be derailed, because from what I understand, being a PA is a physically and emotionally draining job with extreme hours and a lot of stress/frustration... so why do I want to do something like that? well I have no idea, but something in me is saying YES [while something smaller is saying NO].

       We will see in time.


-Kevin

Friday, February 8, 2013

Things to Think About

              I met with my Senior Thesis adviser yesterday

 (I haven't actually signed up for the credit yet) and he told me he doesn't think i should do this as a Senior thesis. He thinks I should either do it as another independent study or just do it as a personal project and ask for advice and help whenever I want it from whatever faculty I want. What am I supposed to do about that? How am I supposed to take that? I know some of the professors will tear me apart and they are not fans of traditional styles, and my doc. is very traditionally styled, but really, what am I supposed to do about this? Talked to my father about it and he thinks I should do the senior thesis anyway, because what's the point in only asking for criticism from people I think will agree with me (and i agree [haha]) but what's the point in putting myself through all the extra stress and emotional turmoil of bringing it in front of a disagreeable panel? It's like asking a surrealist painter for criticism on your charcoal still-life.

I'm torn, I really am. Am I afraid of not being good enough for them? (In which case I need their advice more than ever) Or am I resigned to the idea that they can't help me?
I know I'm not an amazing filmmaker, there are a lot of things my education lacked, like how to get good audio. A VERY IMPORTANT ASPECT of filmmaking. I was taught how to get interesting sounds, how to use a contact mike, how to use other mics, but dialogue was discouraged. Honestly, WHAT THE FUCK. I feel like I've wasted four years.

Frustrated, clearly.



       In other news, I have started actually editing scenes together, and it's going alright... so far. we'll see when I step back and look at them from a detached standpoint.

Pardon my rant.

-Kevin